Why is there a need to overshare on social media?
He splashes photos of himself on social media while at the dentist, having a hole in his tooth filled. He constantly tells the world how wonderful his breakfast is and puts photos there to prove that. You may ask why the world needs to know about dentist visits and what one has for breakfast.
The oversharing phenomenon is relatively new but has deeper roots in human psychology. To understand why people feel the need to share banal activities with the world, let us examine three distinct but converging theories.
The first theory argues that those who overshare have psychological feelings called ‘ FOMO-fear of missing out’. This feeling manifests when one feels behind their peers in social spaces, and they ought to catch up with them so that they, too, can enjoy the feeling of social enjoyment.
The second theory draws on Maslow’s famous framework- the hierarchy of needs.
In the framework, you have five stages of needs that all of us go through to meet specific needs. Although it is rare to see people satisfying all their needs at each stage, it is an aspiration for all of them to be met. At the bottom of the framework, you have basic needs such as shelter, food, sleep and clothing- Maslow calls these physiological needs; the second sits safety needs, followed by love and belonging.
In the fourth stage, we meet the need to have esteem- social status, and self-respect. It is at this stage that the theory links the cause of online oversharing; in other words, those who overshare are seeking social recognition and status among their peers.
The third and final theory points out the presence of personality disorders such as narcissism, where the sufferer has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves; therefore, they need to feed their feelings, and the more they get external validation, the more they overshare banal existence.
While each theory has merits regarding the root causes of online oversharing, we should be interested in the outcome; for example, we need to ask, regardless of the original need to overshare, does the exercise benefit the doer? Experts in the field of human psychology in the digital space clearly state that oversharing causes more anxiety and a loss of respect from others. As the famous saying goes, familiarity breeds contempt.
The author of the widely read book- The 48 Laws of Power, Robert Greene, is among those who warn against online oversharing; he argues that one will lose power and influence if they are always there for all to see. Instead, he advocates selective presence and, at times, no presence on social media for a period of time.
My moral argument for writing this piece is not to advocate a break from social connections but rather to point out that oversharing does more harm than good for those who regularly exercise. Share but not overshare.
